A Toast to 2019
2020 is almost HERE. Time flies when you’re having fun, ey?
Without fail, a new year always brings reflections and resolutions. A new year mentally allows us to release and renew pieces and parts of ourselves that need it. Admittedly, not everything sticks, but I still think there’s something really special about setting intentions for a new year and celebrating wins and moments from the prior one.
My family has a really nice tradition when we go on vacation that was actually started by a friend of mine and managed to stick years later. Every night at dinner, we each pick a moment of the day - big or small doesn’t matter - and we share it with the table. It can range from a delicious breakfast, to learning a new skill, to watching a gorgeous sunset, to celebrating a birthday, or to sharing a belly-laugh with a friend. It’s something I’ve really come to look forward to, and I think it’d be a perfect end of year exercise. We are pretty strict about only allowing one per person, but since this is my blog, I’m going to choose five moments, in no particular order, to share before closing out 2019.
Moments
Becoming Bridal Director - Getting a promotion at work is always a great thing, but this opportunity was especially special and important. It’s truly made me even more passionate about the industry that I work in, and motivated to grow and push myself beyond my perceived limits. I’m incredibly blessed to be working with an all-star team, and I’m thrilled to learn from them everyday. Even more than that, I’m fortunate enough to be working to create a product that is generational and will be treasured for many years to come - maybe that’s the best part about fine jewelry. It’s emotional and it has the power to create and cement memories, stories, and legacies.
Thanksgiving - This Thanksgiving was perfect. My entire family was together for the first time in a while, and getting to spend quality time with them all together is so special. On top of that, we were surrounded by fantastic friends in a picture-book setting. These are the times that I will cherish always and forever, and that will carry me through tough or stressful times. It’s not even necessarily about have deep or long conversations - it’s more about the small chats, the inside jokes, the opinion or story shared that you’d never heard before. As my siblings and I get older, busier, more independent I realize how more and more important these little moments in time will become. Also, I’m always happy when I get some quality diving in - which, definitely happened! The ocean is my truest happy place - having those that I love me there to enjoy it with me is icing on the cake!
Girls’ Game Night - Back in January, I started a Girls’ Game Night, not really knowing what to expect or what would come out of it. Flash forward to today, and it’s since become one of my favorite nights of the month. It’s brought women into my life that I may have never crossed paths with and it has strengthened existing relationships. We laugh, we drink, we debate, we eat, we ask the big and hard questions, we celebrate each other, and sometimes, we actually play games. I love that it’s a truly mixed bag of women in all different stages of life with lots of different opinions, backgrounds, and view points. I’ve learned a lot about a lot from these women, and I’m just so honored to get to call these bad ass ladies my friends. Looking forward to another year!
A PPG Wedding - My best friend in the universe got married this year and I was lucky enough to get to stand by her side. There was so much love it was radiating throughout the entire weekend. Two families came together as if always destined to. I didn’t understand a lot of what was being said (more than half the group was from Colombia), but I felt so welcomed. I’ve been to a lot of weddings at this point in my life, and they have all been special, but there was something about this one that truly was magic. Maybe it was because there was no questioning how happy, calm, and safe my best friend was as we got ready that day. There was a feeling of peace in the air that settled throughout the entire day. Maybe it was the gorgeous, quaint setting. Maybe it was watching two completely different families come together so seamlessly - and both of them adopting me into that mix. I’ve know her family forever - I basically lived at their house for a time, and they are so deeply important to me and getting this time with them was nothing short of a blessing. Or maybe it was listening to the speeches from his friends and family around the bonfire the night before - which were raw and real and just so refreshingly honest and pure. Maybe it was the alcohol. Regardless, is was perfect.
Luna & Binx - You knew they were going to make the list, right? OF COURSE. My (big) babies. This was my first full year with them, and I just couldn’t love them more. They truly have made my house a home, and I’m just so darn happy to be their cat-momma. They make me feel safe and loved and cozy - and they are constantly coming up with new ways to make me laugh. I sleep better with them in my bed, even though they take up more than half of it. Whether they are being little angels or little devils, I wouldn’t trade them for anything in the world. I used to consider myself completely independent, and now I think they’ve ruined that a bit. I’m okay with it though!
Moving past 2019 into 2020, I’d like to once again set some goals for myself to work on throughout year. They vary on scale and commitment, but I think that they will all help me become a better me - a me that’s turning 30 in 2020! I had a few 2019 resolutions: do more yoga (or any yoga at all), have more dinner parties, travel, and take a step further in my career. I accomplished three of these (see above). As far as yoga goes … well … not so much.
Intentions
Do More Yoga - Making the list again! Maybe 2020 is the year?! It will be helpful for the next item on the list.
Climb Kilimanjaro - This is a HUGE (literally 19,341 feet / 5,895 meters) goal that will require a lot of mini resolutions like training, hiking and the dreaded stair-master, but I’ll leave it high level for now. Main goal: GET TO THE TOP.
No Phone Zone - I’ve gotten really bad about letting my phone sneaking into other activities - it’s now more of a habit than a conscious decision and I think that’s scary. If I’m watching TV at home, I’m also looking at my phone. If I’m walking around the neighborhood listening to a podcast, I still sneak looks at the screen or social media. If I’m in a meeting, I’ll check my phone at least a couple of times. If I’m reading at the coffee shop, I’ll pause to check my phone. It’s too much and it’s creepily robotic at this point. Mindless, really. Moving into 2020, I want to be more present - and that means breaking myself of some really bad habits like this one.
Open Up - I’m an admittedly emotionally closed off person. This doesn’t mean that I have trouble making friend or holding a conversation - I think I’m actually pretty good at that. I am hard to really get to know though, past my everyday persona. I’d like to get better about offering more of myself to those that I trust and care about - to not be resistant to deeper relationships. I tend to abruptly close down if I feel that someone is getting a little to personal. It’s hard to pinpoint exactly why I do this - it’s not a fully conscious decision. And while I don’t think it’s all bad or wrong, I do think it can be limiting and isolating at times. I want to say I love you more, and not have it be so hard. This is probably the hardest one for me on the list, so we’ll see how it goes.
Read More Non-Fiction - I read a lot, but 98% of it is fiction. I’d like to push myself to read more non-fiction. Whether that’s self-help, business, historical, or a biography - doesn’t matter!
Goodbye, 2019
2019 was good to me. It was a stable year for me - if that makes sense. I experienced growth and change, but it was very gradual. “There’s so much life to be lived in the in-between.” I’m totally okay with this, as the prior few years saw major change and growth - often very painful or abrupt. It’s nice to have a year to settle in to all the pieces of you that have shifted from life and all its lessons.
I had a great year - but I know that not everyone did. If you’re reading this and 2019 wasn’t all that you had hoped it’d be or you feel down or defeated, I hope you know that it is never to late to change your story. I used to be so scared of the concept of “choosing a path.” I was honestly terrified that the decisions I’ve made in years prior had set me on a course that could never be altered. I told myself that all my decisions were permanent. It’s such a bruising lie. And after years of giving myself those bruises over and over again, I finally realized how big of a lie that is. Your life is yours. This doesn’t mean that you can forget or tread on those who around you to achieve what you want, but it does mean that it’s okay to put your happiness first - EVEN if if makes other people uncomfortable, confused, or judgmental. I found that once I put myself first and let go of the persona I imagined everyone expected or wanted me to be, it’s much easier for me to celebrate the happiness of others and live lighter, free-er, easier. While the timing right now just happens to be the start of a new year/decade, it really doesn’t matter the day. You can take the wheel of your life any moment that you choose. I know that’s SCARY. I have felt and, at times, still feel that fear. Lean into that feeling. Jump. The fear is there to prove it’s worth it. It’s where the magic happens.
Also, newsflash. The world is BIG and you are SMALL. That’s one of the reasons I love travel and the stars so much. They have taught me over and over again (because it’s easy to forget) that I’m only the center of my universe, not everyone else’s. Look up the sky, remind yourself that the world is going to keep on spinning, and the stars are going to keep showing up in the sky, and that you have at least one person supporting you (that’s me, if you didn’t catch it). And remember: coming back to where you started is not the same as never leaving.
I’d also like to say thank you to every one who has helped make 2019 magical. Thank you to the people who made me forget to check my phone, the people who made me laugh until I cried, the people who taught me something new about the world or myself, the people who taught me about how still even today, humans can surprise you - for better and for worse. Thank you to everyone who shared their wisdom, their stories, their stability, or their strength with me. I’m so appreciative. Thank you to those who I shared only a few moments with, and thank you to those who are still here today.
I shared this quote last year, and you know, I think it’s still perfect.
May your coming year be filled with magic and dreams and good madness. I hope you read some fine books and kiss someone who thinks you’re wonderful, and don’t forget to make some art — write or draw or build or sing or live as only you can. And I hope, somewhere in the next year, you surprise yourself.
Hello, 2020
All my love and best wishes,
Alex